Chocolate Hills

Bohol is an island province of the Philippines located in the Central Visayas region. Its capital is Tagbilaran City. It is the 10th largest island in the country, located in the heart of the Visayas. To the west of Bohol is Cebu, to the northeast is the island of Leyte and to the south, across the Bohol Sea is Mindanao. Besides the tarsier (see my previous post), Bohol is also famous for the Chocolate Hills.

The best viewpoint for the Chocolate Hills is located at this tourist spot. You have to climb 210 steps to the top.

Once you reach the top you're greeted by this sign explaining what the Chocolate Hills actually are and how they were formed.

The Chocolate Hills are composed of around 1,268 perfectly cone-shaped hills of about the same size, spread over an area of more than 50 square kilometres. They are covered in green grass that turns brown during the dry season, hence the name.

There are a number of geological proposals regarding the formation of the hills. These include simple limestone weathering, sub-oceanic volcanism, the uplift of the seafloor and a more recent theory which maintains that as an ancient active volcano self-destructed, it spewed huge blocks of stone which were then covered with limestone and later thrust forth from the ocean bed.

Geologists have actually long debated about the formation of the hills, resulting in various ways the origin of the Chocolate Hills are stated or explained. The one written on the bronze plaque we saw eariler states that they are eroded formations of a type of marine limestone that sits on top of hardened clay.

The plaque reads:

“The unique land form known as the Chocolate Hills of Bohol was formed ages ago by the uplift of coral deposits and the action of rain water and erosion.”

Whatever the origin might be...

...the Chocolate Hills are an amazing site.

Aimee agrees!

Tarsier

I spent some time on the Philippine island of Bohol. While there I had the pleasure of finally seeing the Philippine's only species of monkey, the tarsier.

Tarsiers are the world's smallest primates. They have enormous eyes and very long hind limbs. Their feet have extremely elongated tarsus bones, from which the animals get their name. The head and body range from 10 to 15 cm in length, but the hind limbs are about twice this long (including the feet), and they also have a slender tail from 20 to 25 cm long. Their fingers are also elongated, with the third finger being about the same length as the upper arm. Most of the digits have nails, but the second and third toes of the hind feet bear claws instead, which are used for grooming. Tarsiers have very soft, velvety fur, which is generally buff, beige, or ochre in color.

They're cute in a furry alien kind of way. They are nocturnal creatures so I was able to sneak up to them while they were sleeping. They heard me approach, opened their eyes, stared at me for a few seconds, then closed their eyes and ignored me. I've never been ignored by something so small before. Silly monkeys.

Manila Metro Rail Transit System

The Manila Metro Rail Transit System, popularly known as the MRT, Metrostar Express or Metrostar, is part of the metropolitan rail system in the Metro Manila area of the Philippines.

Now you're probably asking yourself why I'm doing a blog about something as common as public transportation. Especially something as common as a subway system. You may be wondering what's so special about this train system. Every major city in the world has one. What makes Manila's system worthy of a blog? Well, the only reason I'm writing a blog about it is because I've never been on it. I've been coming to the Philippines since 2001 and I've never, ever, taken their train. I just think this is odd since every other major city I've been to in the world I've always made the effort to take the train. So here I am, living in the Philippines, my new home turf, and I've never taken the train. Well, today, I've decided to fix this problem! I'm taking the train!

I bought my ticket from the teller. The route I chose will take me from the first station all the way to the end. That's a total of 13 stations and 16.95 km. How much did the ticket cost? A mere 15 peso (that's 13 cents CDN. Wow!) My travels start at Taft Avenue Station.

I noticed while I was waiting for the train that there is a dedicated section on the train for elderly, female, children or disabled passengers. I found out the dedicated area was implemented after several groping instances occurred on the packed trains during rush hour. Now women can be in their own section. I do wonder though if 'elderly' refers to older men as well. What's stopping a dirty old man from going into the woman's private section and start a little groping?

The train arrives and I get on.

Here's a picture of me overjoyed to be finally on the Manila train. The ride was smooth. It's a nice train system. I was happy to see me and my train whizzing by all the traffic on the street below. If you were to take this same route by car it would probably take you close to an hour and a half during normal insane Manila traffic conditions. How long did the train ride take?

I arrived at my final, North Avenue Station, stop and got out. I took this photo as I walked up the stairs to leave the station. I looked at my watch and noticed the ride took just under 30 minutes. Taking the train is definitely faster than by car. Once I reached the top of the stairs I noticed another train arriving in the direction I needed to go in order to get back to Taft Avenue. I ran down and hopped onto that train.

Here's a picture of me on my way back. It's not the best photo of me but the only reason I'm including it in this blog is because of all the people behind me. Look how they're looking at me. Isn't it disturbing? It's almost like they're never seen a Canadian guy on their train system before. Or maybe, just maybe, I've been oblivious to the stares all this time. Maybe people are always looking at me this way? Could it be possible, I've just never noticed this before? So disturbing... I feel a little paranoid. First the cocks are staring at me now the Filipinos. It's enough to make a poor Canadian guy go buggy.

When I finally arrived back at Taft Avenue Station I discovered I was able to leave without paying for the return trip. Since I never left the station at North Avenue Station my ticket still worked. That's 13 cents CDN for a roundtrip train ticket. So cheap!

Bee Farm

We went to a bee farm last weekend. The Ilog Maria Honey Bee Farm is located in Cavite. Here's some brief information about Cavite: Cavite is a province in the Philippines located on the southern shores of Manila Bay in the Calabarzon region in Luzon, just 30 kilometers south of Manila. Its capital is the city of Trece Martires. Cavite is surrounded by the provinces of Laguna to the east and Batangas to the south. To the west lies the South China Sea.

Got that? Okay good, moving on.

It was about a three hour drive to the bee farm.

Once you park your car you walk down this path leading to the house. The path is lined on both sides by bee hives. From a distance this house looks almost abandoned so needless to say my first impression wasn't a good one.

I walked up close to one of the bee hives and took this photo. I think the bees were rather annoyed I was interrupting their honey making chores. Several of them started buzzing around my head. One even flew up and head butted me. I took the hint and moved on.

Once you finish your walk down the path you reach the house. The house is actually broken up into a store, a factory, offices, and various social areas. It's actually quite busy with staff and customers moving around. My first impression about the house being abandoned was incorrect. This place is popular! Here's me standing in front of an enclosed bee hive. Obviously since these bees were behind glass I didn't have to worry about an angry mob of evil bees attacking me.

Without the glass I highly doubt I would have been able to get this close to the bee here. He looks innocent enough but I can see it in his eyes, he's evil, and he wants blood.

The path leading up to the house isn't the only place that has bee hives. They're located all over the property. This photo was taken in behind the house.

And this photo was taken along the front. The path in the far distance is the one we walked down to get to the house.

Let's go into the store.

They make a wide variety of products from the honey and the bees wax.

Among these products are a wide selection of cosmetics like the soaps shown in the photo.

They also sell a huge variety of bees wax candles. Besides the standard everyday candles they also sell religious shaped ones. Look, you can make your very own nativity scene out of bees wax candles!

As I walked around the store and picked up various things to buy I noticed one very important component to a bee farm was missing: honey. There was no honey in the store. How can a bee farm not have any honey? It defines logic. I discovered later that all the edible honey products were kept behind the counter. I suppose that makes some sense. In the bee farm world honey is your gold bullion. Honey is liquid gold! And gold needs to be locked up!

Beside the store is where the magic happenes. It's here in the factory that they make all the bee related products. These girls are cutting and packaging soap.

Besides bee products the Ilog Maria Honey Bee Farm also grows it's own coffee. They grow it, dry it, charcoal roast it, and sell it in their store. This photo shows the coffee beans, still in their skins, drying in the sun.

Remember my post about cocks? Remember I said cocks are everywhere here in the Philippines? Well, to prove it to you, look, cocks hanging out with the bees. See cocks are everywhere!

Hey, what's this giant bee hive? Let's go inside and find out.

Now I know I posted a blog before about toilets so I don't want you to think I have some wierd toilet fetish but I do think this is pretty cool. A toilet in a bee hive, how original! It's like having modern comfort and the natural outdoors all in one!

When we left the bee farm and started our drive back to the Metro Manila area I saw fields upon fields of pineapple crop plantations. Along the roadside of these plantations were small stores selling the pineapples and other fruits. This photo shows a few pineapples in the foreground and the pineapple plantations in the background.

So many pineapples to choose from. We chose the best four pineapples we could find and continued our long trek back to Manila! A great day with the bees!

Cocks

There are a lot of cocks in the Philippines.
You see cocks in parks.
You see cocks by the side of roads.
You see cocks on people's property.
You see cocks in parking lots.
You see cocks on trucks.
You see cocks on public transportation.
Sometimes you see dirty cocks.
Sometimes the cocks are clean, freshly washed, and shiny.
You see cocks all over.
Sometimes you see cocks hanging out with other cocks.
Sometimes you see cocks hanging out alone.
Sometimes the cocks are tied up.
Sometimes the cocks are free.
Sometimes the cocks are in cages.
So many cocks.
Cocks all over.
You can't go through a day without seeing several cocks.
Cocks cocks cocks.
Why are there so many cocks?
Who owns the cocks?
Sometimes I get the feeling the cocks are staring at me.
Maybe they're spy cocks?
Cocks hired by the Filipino government to watch the Pinoy people.
Big brother cock.
The cocks make me paranoid.

I think all of these cocks are fighting cocks. Cock fighting is legal here in the Philippines so everyone seems to have a trained fighting cock. I don't necessarily agree with this, but you can't deny the fact that legalized cock fighting translates to a country filled with cocks. And they're all angry. Angry pissed off cocks. If the cocks were motivated enough I think due to their great numbers they could take over. A country run by cocks. Imagine that!

Don't touch the cock. It's angry!

Honking

I've written a few blogs about the insane traffic conditions here in the Philippines, but I've never written anything about car horns. Car horns are an interesting topic. The horn itself isn't that interesting but the meaning behind the honk is worth looking at.

Honking in Canada seems to be connected with aggression. People that honk tend to be annoyed, or worse, suffering from road rage. If you get honked at in Canada you tend to immediately go on the defensive. You start wondering why you're being honked at. If you can't figure out why the honk happened you automatically assume the honker is an asshole. There's no debate here, the honker is an asshole.

If horns could talk, here's what they would be saying in both Canada and the Philippines:

CANADA: "You asshole. You cut me off. You're driving too slow and I hate you. I HATE YOU."

See, it's all about aggression.

Now let's look at the Philippines:

PHILIPPINES: "Excuse me friend, how are you? I can't help but notice that you're driving a touch too close to me. If you don't mind, and if it isn't any trouble, please move slightly to the left. Thank you Sir, have a wonderful day and God bless."

If you were to do a study of traffic conditions in the world and pick a place where road rage should be happening it's here in the Philippines. People don't follow the lanes. People swerve their cars constantly. People run red lights. People tailgate. People cut you off. People block traffic entirely by doing a U-Turn. People drive slowly while texting on the phone. Busses and jeepneys stop in the middle of the road to left people off which causes huge traffic jams. All these things are incredibly annoying. It annoys me just thinking about it. But here's the funny thing: road rage doesn't exist here. Not at all. Why is that?

I think it's all about the mindset. Filipinos use the car horn as an extended form of communication. It's like a 'hello'. They honk even when it's not necessary to honk. They could be the only car on the road in the middle of the night and they would still honk. The horns add a happy vibe to your driving experience

Canadians only honk when it's absolutely necessary to honk. Someone cuts you off and you're angry. You place you hand on the horn but don't apply the pressure at first. You start debating if you're 100% correct for honking at this person. You need to be correct. If there's any doubt here, either from you or the receiver of the honk then you may, most likely, be classified as an asshole. Who wants to be an asshole?

I think Canadians need to adopt the Filipino style of honking. Sure it adds unbearable noise pollution to your morning commute but at least everyone on the road is your friend. Personally I prefer a world where I have hundreds of friends on the road rather than that one annoying asshole.

Pearl Farm Resort

I often wonder if Filipinos think the same way about tropical beach resorts as Canadians do. Canadians treat tropical resorts as the closest thing to paradise. I guess we think this way because there's no such thing as a tropical beach resort in Canada. At least, I've never sat on a powder white sands beach in Canada sucking back coconut juice out of a straw. It's the uniqueness of the experience that makes it like paradise. But if you're a Filipino, you must be used to this stuff. I know from my experience over here I'm starting to get used to this stuff. Before, if you were to offer me a coconut with a straw sticking out of it I'd be like, "OH WOW COOL, hand that over!" But now it's more like, "Oh, another coconut. Gee, how original, thanks." The resort experience is getting familiar but that doesn't mean it's still not fun to do!

Our travels for a beach resort brought us to Davao. Davao is located on the southeastern portion of Mindanao here in the Philippines. It consists of four provinces, namely: Compostela Valley, Davao del Norte, Davao Oriental, and Davao del Sur. The region encloses the Davao Gulf and its regional center is Davao City.

We saw very little of Davao City. Once our plane landed we immediately took a cab to to where the resort's boat was waiting for us. The resort is called Pearl Farm Resort and it's on an island called Samal Island. In this photo, the boat behind my motley crew of resort hoppers is the boat that took us to Samal Island. As we approached the island I found myself thinking about that TV show Fantasy Island. Instead of a private plane taking us to the island we had a private boat.

Unlike the show Fantasy Island there wasn't a midget named Tattoo ringing a bell yelling, "Da plane, da plane." Or in our case, "Da boat, da boat." What we heard on approaching the island is some interesting jungle trance techno music. I loved the sound of it. Or at least, I loved the sound of it THEN. More on that later...

When we got off the boat we were immediately greeted by the Pearl Farm staff with a pineapple drink in a bamboo cup.

Here's Aimee standing in front of the Pearl Farm Resort sign. Incidentally, here's the write up about the resort of their website:

Nestled on the quiet side of Samal Island, The Pearl Farm Beach Resort is a mere 45-minute boat ride from the wharf. This fourteen (14) hectare spread was once a pearl farm, where thousands of white-lipped oysters transported from the Sulu Sea, were cultivated for their pink, white and gold pearls. Today, the resort beckons with the promise of a relaxing, private retreat, under the care of its friendly and charming staff.

Sulu Sea? Wow, it's taking a lot of effort not to say a Star Trek joke right now.

When you arrive at Pearl Farm Resort they not only hand you a pineapple drink but also a baby to guide you during your stay.

Seriously.

Okay, I'm joking. In behind Aimee and my niece are rows of bamboo built cottages. They are built over the water on stilts. We stayed in one of these. It's an interesting experience waking up in the morning to the sound to water splashing underneath you. Okay, I'm going to say it ... it's p-a-r-a-d-i-s-e.

Davao is known for many things. One of these things is the fruit pomelo. It's similiar to a grapefruit only larger and sweeter. During our stay at Pearl Farm we ate pomelo in numerous ways: freshly picked and peeled, blended into shakes, chopped into salads, you name it.

Obviously resorts mean relaxation. We did plenty of that.

At night we were serenaded by a band of three musicans who seemed to have endless knowledge of every song in the universe. My personal favourite of the band is the guy in the middle. I love his shades! He's so cool. Only cool people can wear sunglasses at night (IE: Corey Hart. I shall call my favourite man Pinoy Hart!).

This is a view from our bamboo cottage. You can see behind me in the distance the place where the boat dropped us off a day before. The boats arrive every 30 minutes. And every 30 minutes they play the jungle beat trance music. Remember that music? The music I loved? Every 30 minutes people. Every damn 30 minutes. It starts playing in the morning and continues playing into the evening. Every 30 minutes. 30 boom boom boom minutes boom boom boom. After a while I wanted to find out where the music was played from, go there and break the damn CD.

Hey, who let the pasty white guy into the pool? Behind me is that building again. The building that plays the jungle beat music. The second level up is the bar. Obviously we spent some time there since we're all drunks.

Here's Aimee and I practicing for Amazing Race Asia Season III. I discovered that time moves slower when you're paddling in a boat. We rented the boat and paddled to the island across from Samal Island. Once we reach that island we docked the boat, got out, and hung out for a bit. Once the novelty of being on a different island wore off we got back in the boat and paddled back to Samal Island. Our time in the boat seemed like an hour and a half but the time in reality ended up being thirty minutes. Either I'm out of shape and the pain in my arms from paddling made it seem longer or we were trapped in a time warp. I'm sticking to the time warp idea.

So what is my impression of Pearl Farm Resort? I liked it, but I think we stayed a day too long. We stayed for two nights when one would have been enough. The trouble with the resort is you're trapped on an island and you have to depend on the resort for everything. They had only one restaurant and after eating the same type of food three meals a day two days in a row it was getting boring. I think the resort needs to jazz the place up a bit. Bring it into the new millennium. That tiki bamboo look worked well in the 70s but I think it's old school now. Mix some modern stuff with the bamboo. And please, oh please, mix your music up a bit. The jungle trance music is going to make someone go postal one day.

Product Packaging

Product packaging is an important thing. If not only helps advertise and sell the contents inside the packaging but it also helps you recognize what what the product actually is. When you walk down the aisles of a grocery store you can usually tell the difference between the juice section and the cleaning products section. Here in the Philippines it's pretty much the same but there are a few exceptions. Here's a good example:

Two bottles: one contains a delicious beverage that will quench your thirst on a hot and humid Philippine summer. The other, if drunk, will KILL YOU!

You have a 50/50 chance of selecting the correct bottle for your drinking pleasure. But you also have a 50/50 chance of swallowing back some poison and killing youself. Are you willing to take a chance with these odds?

Let's start turning the bottles towards the labels. Halfway there. Some of you with a keen sense of product labelling may already know which bottle you're going to drink. Some of you may wish to keep turning the bottles to see the whole label.

Paint Thinner and Sugar Cane Beverage. Did you choose correctly?

The Sugar Cane Beverage is a delicious alcoholic drink that when chilled really makes you feel good during a hot and humid day. Like most alcoholic drinks moderation is is the best policy. Too much of this could make you sick but not as sick as...

Paint Thinner! For a bottle of paint thinner it definitely looks delicious and refreshing. I like how the label isn't even glued on probably. It's starting to peel off. Imagine if the label fell off; you would really be screwed. It's like playing Russian Roulette with a beverage. I suggest never storing your paint thinner in the same place as your liquor cabinet.